What about me?"
Something I learned a few years ago was to find something that I enjoy. Something for me! My kids are part of the youth bell choirs at our church. Yes, we're lucky to have two handbell choirs for children - one for grades 3-6, the other for jr/sr high. I loved watching them play (still do!). I was missing my time singing in the vocal choir, but that wasn't practical for a mom of five who needed to be in the pew with her children.
Playing in the adult handbell choir was something that I could do. It allowed me to participate in something musical, have some time with other adults, and allowed me to be in the pew with my children during most of the service. They're now old enough where I don't need to put anyone in the nursery while I play.
I know that my time at bell choir (and any other "me" activity) isn't because I'm selfish. Actually quite the opposite. Just like going to the dentist, which isn't as much fun, I know that to be a good wife and mother I need to be good to myself first. What better way than making a joyful noise!